


Hurt Me Once

by la_faye_tte



Series: The world has changed [a series of Ted/Paul fics] [1]
Category: The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals - Team StarKid
Genre: Angst, Break Up, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-06
Updated: 2019-11-06
Packaged: 2021-01-23 13:07:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21320674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/la_faye_tte/pseuds/la_faye_tte
Summary: A Ted/Paul break-up fic. May be read as a stand-alone.
Relationships: Paul Matthews/Ted, Ted/Paul Matthews
Series: The world has changed [a series of Ted/Paul fics] [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1544002
Comments: 3
Kudos: 30





	Hurt Me Once

“What?” Ted’s voice was caught in his throat. He knew he heard it perfectly well but he didn’t want to believe it. Not yet.

Paul couldn’t look him in the eyes as he took a deep breath and forced himself to say it again. “I don’t want to do this anymore.” God, he didn’t even sound like himself when he said it. They couldn’t really be at the end, could they?

Ted couldn’t tell what he was feeling. It was heat and cold at the same time but not cancelling each other out. He felt the heat in his head and his chest. He felt the cold in his bones and his hands. The silence was only disturbed by shattering glass as the bottle of red wine he’d been holding, fell to the floor. It echoed the breaking within his ribs. 

Paul bit the inside of his cheek as he waited for the outburst he knew was coming. He hid his hands in his pockets to keep them from fidgeting. He can’t let them betray him. If he showed any bit of doubt now, then he would just lose his resolve, apologize for crying wolf, and fall back into old habits.

Maybe it was a miracle that neither of them started crying yet. Maybe it wasn’t. Maybe it was because of denial. Maybe it was because of stubbornness. It’s not too long before the first tears fall though.

“One year and you don’t want to do this anymore. Why.” It wasn’t a question. It was a demand through gritted teeth and uneven breaths from Ted.

Paul still won’t look at him. Only the floor, as if the tiles were his prompter. They weren’t. He couldn’t even imagine the words of the answer to be found in them. Because the truth is, he couldn’t come up with a proper answer. Not one that wouldn’t drive the stake further into the heart. _I’m tired of fighting. I’m tired of you messing with me. I’m tired of you caring more about that asshole reputation of yours over me. I can tell how tired you are of putting up with me all the time. I’m scared that eventually you’ll get tired of the parts of me that aren’t functioning right. And I don’t think I can handle waiting until that happens. I can’t wait until the time that you’d be my everything, only for me to lose you._

Paul breaks. It’s one way to get out of telling the truth. He stops holding back and he’s trembling in his spot. Still not looking up. “I just can’t do this anymore” he tries not to sound so helpless as he said it. And whether he meant the break-up or the remains of their relationship, he couldn’t distinguish anymore.

“What? Can’t love me anymore?” Ted’s voice cracked. He’s suddenly exhausted and drained. Utterly wrecked too. He’d done his best hadn’t he? He’d tried to be a better person. He let himself be soft, let himself fall in love. There still had to be some straws to grasp at right?

“Yeah.” Paul trembled and he hoped it wouldn’t be obvious that he’s lying.

Ted swallowed a lump in his throat that he didn’t recall forming. He tears his own gaze away and nods. “I was gonna say I wasn’t done with loving you. That I wasn’t planning on stopping yet, but there’s no point anymore. You’ve decided and I guess you’re not choosing me.” With that, he walks out the door, slamming it behind him.

That slam punctuated everything. While Paul felt like running out that door to follow and desperately beg for forgiveness, he forced himself to stay inside. He had to stand by this decision right? Even if he regrets tonight, there’s nothing that could be done. He can’t take this back.

**Author's Note:**

> This ship started out as a "what if." But the more I thought about it and talked about it with a friend, I ended up shipping it. Whoops.
> 
> Also I missed writing angst so... this happened.


End file.
